Challenged with “I’m not good enough?” Do this one daily hack to kick butt

It seems to me that everyone has felt they weren’t good enough at one or more times in their life. I know I certainly have. At one time in my life, I felt this way all the time and it caused many undesirable behaviors and negative feelings. For me and others I’ve known and served, that belief was associated with not accepting all my imperfections. By not accepting all my imperfections, which most people have many, I began to hide and pretend. I hid due to the shame I carried and not wanting anyone to know for fear they would not accept me. That’s why I pretended to be someone other than my true self. Shame and self-love and acceptance can’t reside together. I can have guilt and self-love together. In fact, feeling guilty is a healthy form of self-love. Shame and guilt, though, are two very different emotions.

All humans crave connection with others. It’s our greatest need to be loved and accepted. Yet when I didn’t accept who I really was I pretended in the form of people pleasing, having to perform for others or aspired to be a perfectionist, in order to get people to accept me. I was always on the slippery ground and it was just a matter of time that my house came crashing down in the form of depression, closing myself off from people including my family, and passing over opportunities for growth, fun, and adventure. I ended up with the worse form of lack of self-acceptance, an addiction; the act of numbing a deep pain.

In my video, I describe one thing for you to do every day as a way to gain self-acceptance, even of your many imperfections. When you begin to accept all of yourself, you’ll free

Jack Up Your Brain!; How to make your brain work in hyperdrive!


Emily Deans M.D.

The modern prescription of high carbohydrate, low-fat diets and eating snacks between meals has coincided with an increase in obesity, diabetes, and increase in the incidence of many mental health disorders, including depression, anxiety, and eating disorders. In addition, many of these disorders are striking the population at younger ages. While most people would agree that diet has a lot to do with the development of obesity and diabetes, many would disagree that what we eat has much to do with our mental health and outlook. I believe that what we eat has a lot to do with the health of our brains, though of course, mental illness (like physical illness) has multifactorial causes, and by no means should we diminish the importance of addressing all the causes in each individual. But let’s examine the opposite of the modern high carbohydrate, low fat, constant snacking lifestyle and how that might affect the brain.

The opposite of a low fat, snacking lifestyle would be the lifestyle our ancestors lived for tens of thousands of generations, the lifestyle for which our brains are primarily evolved. It seems reasonable that we would…..

Go to the article on the Psychology Today blog


Your Brain on Exercise!


From ADDICTIONS to MENTAL ILLNESS, EXERCISE is increasingly recommended as part of a TREATMENT PLAN

By Pete Williams

(from USA Triathlon Fall 2017 Magazine)

The multisport lifestyle is full of success stories of people who overcame addictions and depression by adopting a busy training schedule of swimming, biking and running.

After all, it’s difficult to train for a triathlon with addictions getting in the way. Throw in the endorphin rush of training and the joy of competition that never grows old, and it’s not surprising that a number of athletes have beaten addiction, depression and even ADHD by replacing a bad habit with a healthy one such as triathlon training.

John Ratey, a clinical professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, remembers when such positive body-mind connections were not widely recognized. During his residency in Boston at the height of the first running boom in the 1970s, Ratey worked with a marathon runner who had grown depressed when he stopped running and

You Already Have Freedom, it’s Joy That You Really Seek

If you’re chasing financial freedom you may never find it. Joy and financial freedom are not the same thing. As you seek to live joyously, you’ll be able to capture the financial abundance that is already yours in the world.

Family fitness; 5 simple ideas to start this spring!

My oldest son Colin and I hiked Philmont Scout Ranch together when he was 14 years old.
My oldest son Colin and I hiked Philmont Scout Ranch together when he was 14 years old.

When my boys were growing up we were all fairly active.They didn’t watch too much TV and fortunately for us video games didn’t really exist. They played little league baseball in the summer and basketball in the winter. They played soccer as well. They were mostly burning off energy being boys. Today there are family distractions of your time that if not watched may lead to some unhealthy behaviors and habits that will be hard to break in the future.

Because kids and parents are less active today there is a rise in obesity, depression and family discord. Distractions of your attention away from healthy habits include;

  1. Processed food (its easy to prepare, it looks healthy when it’s not, and it tastes good because of the non-natural ingredients especially sugar)
  2. Video games (they are so prevalent that most smart phones have free apps to play against yourself but also friends and most of the games you’re sitting doing them and getting no exercise except your fingers. The reason they are free is you’re bombarded with advertisements.)
  3. Television programing (unfortunately many programs are not painting the picture of healthy families)
  4. Social media (The connection to other human beings has a powerful draw of our time to use social media such as FaceBook, Twitter and Pinterest. Just the light these smart phones emit at night wreak havoc with your ability to sleep sound and the emotions they can create from reading a post can be disconcerting.)

Taking those distractions into account I’ve created five simple ideas to use to transition your family this spring and start creating new and healthy family habits.

  1. Plan family time away from the four distractions. Even if it’s just one night a week would be a great start. It could be a bike ride, a game outside of hide and seek or creating a Frisbee golf course in the back yard. One night a month have a family get together, perhaps at a weekend meal, with a family fun calendar. The key is to plan it and involve all the family members in creating it. Assignments may include a treat, being in charge of the event or inviting other people to attend.
  2. Plant a small garden. You could plant some tomatoes in an old barrel or maybe some flowers. Each family member could have their own garden plot and plant what ever they wanted and then at least once a week the family would cultivate, take photos and gather around the garden to take part.
  3. Prepare healthy snacks in advance and eat them during the day and night. This way they’ll avoid the tendency to just grab a bag of potato chips or get an unhealthy diet or regular soda to drink because it’s convenient.
  4. Make it more fun to do something healthy than it is to watch TV, play a video game or connect on a smart phone. This is one that will take creativity and will be unique to your family. A hobby such as painting or building a model of the USS Constitution might work. Flying kites or a remote-controlled air craft would be fun. Go fishing. Perhaps producing fun videos with a GoPro camera and uploading to Family YouTube site. Even Wii fit has some games that make you move and are best done as a family.
  5. Start a small family business. Did you know that at the turn of the century in 1900 that almost 90% of the population was self-employed and many families participated in a family business? It doesn’t have to be anything major because the aim is to teach family unity, thrift and work ethics. It could be done at nights and on weekends and the entire family enjoys the profit by taking a family vacation.